We arrived to a carnival in D.C., where the crowd was as much of a show as the events on stage. College kids, 20-somethings, 30-somethings, families and senior citizens, in costume as Uncle Sam, The Mad Hatter, Honest Abe, Darth Palin, and illegal aliens with antennae. But above all there were the signs: signs like “I Disagree With you But I Don’t Think You’re Hitler,” “I wanted to write something important but I ran out of lett”, and “I’m Mad As Hell but I’ll probably be fine tomorrow.”

Unfortunately, the polarization of American politics has bled over into the church – there are people who allow issues like LGBT justice and reproductive rights to split the church. I, myself, have been accused of spreading a doctrine of demons in public media.

I would really like to see the church remember its roots as an alternative to the dominant culture – a place of grace, forgiveness, and justice.

Now I’m all for community service, but there’s a big part of me that still gets bitter when people co-opt the WTC tragedy.  9/11 was a huge red-letter date in my life – I was there when it happened and I spent a year working by the pile alongside the construction crews, the police, the USAR folks, the firemen, and all the volunteers.  For my 20-year-old self, it was both formative and traumatizing.

Now, nine years later, I’m kind of surprised to find that I still have resentment built up around that day.  I don’t want that chapter of my life to be co-opted for patriotism.  I don’t want it co-opted for ecumenism.  I don’t even want it co-opted for volunteerism – it just seems manipulative.  When perky activists start talking to me about the 9/11 legacy, I just want to say, “You weren’t there.  You didn’t smell it.  You didn’t see the bodies.  You weren’t even in New York.  You don’t have the right to appropriate that day.”

It doesn’t take a genius to recognize that this isn’t the healthiest of attitudes.  I don’t own 9/11 any more than any one else does, and 9/11 is as good a reason as any to get a bunch of people out volunteering in their communities; it’s certainly be better than everyone staying home and being mopey in their rooms, which is what I usually do.  So I’m going to go out and volunteer with everyone else.  If anyone wants to join me, I encourage you to.

I’m never, however, going to call it “Patriot Day.”

Sadly, war in the East is nothing new ‚Äì some of us may remember Operation Desert-Storm. Some of the older ones among us may remember…the Crusades… There might even be a person or two in the room who remember the Hebrews invading Israel some thirty-three hundred years ago, and how they were in turn attacked by the Philestines, the Persians, the Babylonians and the Romans… And those who remember all that ‚Äì what are you still doing in the 20′s/30′s group? You know who you are…

With all this history of conflict, the question is…How do we bring peace to a warring world? And to answer the question, I’ve opened the lines for some Biblical figures to give us their unput. Hello?

GOLIATH : Urrrrrr…

NARRATOR : Ur to you too. Who may I ask is calling?

GOLIATH : I am Goliath.

NARRATOR : And where are you calling from?

GOLIATH : Gath.

NARRATOR : And how is Gath this time of year?

GOLIATH : Urrrrrr…

NARRATOR : Same here in New York, I hear ya. So we’re wondering. How would you bring peace to a warring world?

GOLIATH : I would stand against the enemy forces, wave my spear at them and shout out ‚ÄúChoose a man for yourselves, and let him come down to me. If he is able to kill me, then we will be your servants; but if I prevail against him and kill him, then you shall be our servants and serve us… Come to me, and I will give your flesh to the birds of the air and [your bones] to the wild animals of the field.” (1 Samuel 17:8-9, 17:44)

NARRATOR : …Well yes, that’s one way of bringing peace, but…

GOLIATH : Also I would call them cowards. And fools. Foolish cowards.

NARRATOR : Alright, thanks. And I see we’ve got another caller. This is..?

SAMSON : This is Samson. You can tell that fool Goliath I killed a thousand men with the jawbone of a donkey, so I bet I could take him down with the beak of a sparrow. (Judges 13:15)

NARRATOR : Um… We’re talking about peace here. How would we bring peace to a warring world?

SAMSON : Oh yeah, um… Well, you let me know how that works out. But if it doesn’t, all I ask is a fresh supply of jawbones and I’ll take on any army.

NARRATOR : Thanks. Okay. Alright. Um. So. Are there any callers who’d like to tell us something about bringing peace to a warring world? Hello?

JAEL : (Pronounced ‚ÄúYah-El‚Äù) Hi, this is Jael. I think, with these men always so hot to clash against each-other on the battle-field, it’s no wonder we never have peace. If you want war, ask men. But if you want peace, you should be asking the women.

NARRATOR : And how would you bring peace about?

JAEL : Well, I remember when there was a terrible battle near my tent, the Canaanites attacked, our men fought bravely, and the Canaanites went into retreat. Their commander, Sisera, snuck into my tent to hide. And even though he was the enemy of my people, I let him in, gave him some water and a place to sleep. (Judges 4:17-20)

NARRATOR : And did your kindness change his disposition?

JAEL : I don’t know if my kindness changed him…because while he was sleeping I took a hammer and drove a tent-peg through his head till it sunk into the ground. (Judges 4:21, 5:24-27)

NARRATOR : Ow…

JAEL : But things definitely got more peaceful after that.

NARRATOR : Um, you know? While we’re on the phone, I think maybe I should…cancel my reservation at your Bed-n-Breakfast, I, um… Something…came up. Urgent.

JAEL : I understand.

NARRATOR : What about prophets? Any prophets out there with a word about peace? Jeremiah, is that you?

JEREMIAH : “The prophets who preceded you and me from ancient times prophesied war, famine, and pestilence against many countries and great kingdoms. As for the prophet who prophesies peace, when the word of that prophet comes true, then it will be known that the Lord has truly sent the prophet.” (Jeremiah 28:8-9)

NARRATOR : And how likely does that seem?

JEREMIAH : Not very.

NARRATOR : Is there no-one who will speak for peace?

ZECHARIAH : Hello? Hello?

NARRATOR : Hello?

ZECHARIAH : Got my voice back just in time! You see, I’d lost it for a while. This is Zechariah, husband of Elizabeth, father of John the Baptizer.

NARRATOR : Quite a resume. And do you have some words of comfort for us?

ZECHARIAH : ‚ÄúBlessed be the Lord God of Israel, for he has looked favorably on his people and redeemed them. He has raised up a mighty savior for us…that we would be saved from our enemies and from the hand of all who hate us. Thus he has shown the mercy promised to our ancestors, and has remembered his holy covenant…that we, being rescued from the hands of our enemies, might serve him without fear, in holiness and righteousness before him all our days… By the tender mercy of our God, the dawn from on high will break upon us, to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace.‚Äù (Luke 1:68-79 Abbreviated)

NARRATOR : Thank you, Zechariah. And our other callers, you were…helpful too. And now, rather than a word from our sponsors, I’d like to share a passage from Isaiah, chapter fifty-seven.

‚ÄúIt shall be said, ‘Build up, build up, prepare the way, remove every obstruction from my people’s [path].’ For thus says the [Lord]: I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with those who are contrite and humble in spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite. For I will not continually accuse, nor will I always be angry; for then the spirits would grow faint before me, even the souls that I have made. Because of their wicked covetousness I was angry; I struck them, I hid… I have seen their ways, but I will heal them; I will lead them and repay them with comfort, creating for mourners the fruit of [song on their] lips. Peace, peace, to the far and the near, says the Lord; and I will heal them. (Isaiah 57:14-19, Abbreviated)

NARRATOR : So there’s an election coming up, and all the candidates are falling over themselves to let us know what they believe, what’s their favorite hymn…WWJVF? Who would Jesus vote for?

So I thought we could ask some of the Hebrew Prophets, see what they had to say about political issues of their day…which, believe it or not, are pretty much exactly the same as now. Should we stand by while the rich get richer and the poor get poorer? Should we go to war? Does God want us to have a king at all?

Naturally, all of the prophets are different, and yet just about all of them had some things in common. It was the prophet’s job to stand against the king, and probably die for it. What do you call a prophet who agrees with the king, who is liked by everyone, who says things are fine? A false prophet. What does king Ahab call the prophet Elijah? Troubler of Israel (1 Kings 18:17). Oh my enemy (1 Kings 21:20). And three times in one day, Ahab sent fifty soldiers to kill him (2 Kings 1). That might be why in so many cases, when the Lord calls to say “You shall be my prophet,” the reply is, almost invariably…

PROPHETS : Oh no, I’m not the one you’re looking for.

NARRATOR : In the tenth century before the common era, what‚Äôs now known as Israel was a group of tribes doing the best they could to raise crops and animals. But sea-pirates called the Philestines showed up on the west coast and started working their way inward, sacking villages, setting up cities, and ruling over the populations. So, the Israelites decided what they needed was a military chieftain to raise up an army and fight. The prophet Samuel warned the Israelites that a king might not be in their best interests…

SAMUEL : “This is what the king‚Ķwill do: He will take your sons and make them serve with his chariots and horses, and they will run in front of his chariots. Some he will assign to be commanders of thousands‚Ķand others to plow his ground and reap his harvest, and still others to make weapons of war. He will take your daughters to be perfumers and cooks and bakers. He will take the best of your fields and vineyards‚Ķand give them to his attendants‚Ķ.He will take a tenth of your flocks, and you yourselves will become his slaves. When that day comes, you will cry out for relief from the king you have chosen, and the Lord will not answer you.” (1 Samuel 8:10-18, NIV)

NARRATOR : …Sound familiar? This is pretty much the standard contract between population and ruler, to this day. Saul, the first chieftain, was cool – he beat the Philestines, but didn’t interfere much with the populace. David was famously David, but Solomon made all of Samuel’s predictions come true and more – taxation, forced labor, the draft, and a brand of inequality the Israelites hadn’t known since Egypt.

Let’s jump forward a couple centuries to Hosea, most hated and unpopular of the prophets, whose hostile words are never preached upon…which in prophetic terms would probably be an A++. The Lord showed up and commanded that Hosea marry a prostitute, as a metaphor for Israel whoring its covenant for material goods and golden idols. Hosea didn’t have a very high opinion of politicians…

HOSEA : “They utter mere words. With empty oaths they make covenants; so litigation springs up like poisonous weeds in the furrows of the field.” (Hosea 10:4, NRSV)

NARRATOR : No really, Hosea, you can…speak frankly here.

HOSEA : “You have plowed wickedness, you have reaped injustice, you have eaten the fruit of lies. Because you have trusted in your power and in the multitude of your warriors, therefore the tumult of war shall rise against your people, and all your fortresses shall be destroyed.” (Hosea 10:13-14, NRSV)

NARRATOR : …Could you write that on a cake? For our election-day party? No? Okay, then let’s turn to the prophet Micah, known to be one of the most amiable. Got a friendly word for us, Micah? The topic is politics.

MICAH : Now hear this, [you] rulers…who [hate] justice and pervert all equity, Who build up [the nation] with bloodshed [and] iniquity [and] give judgement for bribes…Because of you, [the nation] shall be plowed like a field…become heaps of ruins, and the mountain of the temple like the bare hills of the forest. (Micah 3:9-12, NIV, NRSV)

NARRATOR : Have the three of you ever considered starting a rap-group together? You could call it…Prophet Enemy, Straight Outa’ Jordan. Alright, I see we’re running out of time here, and I would like to leave you with some sort of cheerful message… Jesus? You here? Got any kind words about politics?

JESUS : The devil led [me up a mountain in the desert] and in an instant showed [me] all the kingdoms of the world. And the devil said to [me], “To you I will give their glory and all this authority; for it has been given over to me, and I will give it to anyone I please. If you, then, will worship me, it will all be yours.” [I] answered him, “It is written, ‘worship the Lord your God and serve only him.’” (Luke 4:5-8, NRSV)

NARRATOR : Thanks, but seriously now, Jesus. Something positive? What about peace?

JESUS : Do you think I came to bring peace on earth? No, I tell you, but division. (Luke 12:51, NIV)

NARRATOR : Alright, so I guess you’re not going to tell us who to vote for. Could you at least tell us who might win tomorrow’s dog-races? …And it sounds like we’ve lost our trans-temporal communication-link with Jesus. Alright. I guess the moral is that we have been commanded to serve only God, but have chosen the modern democratic system instead…much peace, equality, and security may it bring.

A final note, to those who wish to express their dissatisfaction by boycotting the vote, just remember that’s exactly what those Washington fat-cats want you to do.

[This ending turned out to be a little too “harsh on democracy,” so I re-wrote the ending from after Jesus’s “Devil” story, which was presented as follows…]

NARRATOR : Thanks, but seriously now, Jesus. We live in a large and complex world, and we need leaders down here to look out for us. Is it possible to reconcile serving only God, while still supporting our leaders’ efforts to make the world a better place?

JESUS : “Render unto Caesar what is Caesar’s, and render unto God what is God’s.” (Luke 20:25)

NARRATOR : Caesar didn’t need anybody’s vote. But there was something Caesar did expect that was far more important – Caesar was to be revered as either a god, or the son of a god. What Jesus is saying here, if I may be so bold, is that the laws of Caesar – taxation and so on – should be kept, as long as one does not give him the inward allegiance that is reserved for God alone. And when the day is done, all the gold that Caesar has shaken from the populace is just trash, the false signs of respect are empty, and Caesar has nothing. Jesus, if you would say it one more time…

JESUS : “Render unto Caesar what is Caesar’s, and render unto God what is God’s.” (Luke 20:25)

NARRATOR : So, render unto Caesar what will rust and fade be forgotten. And render unto God what is sacred and eternal.